


get over your hill and see

by prefertheconsultingdetective



Category: X-Men - All Media Types
Genre: M/M, Post-X-Men: Dark Phoenix (2019)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-15
Updated: 2020-11-15
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:28:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,310
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27577199
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/prefertheconsultingdetective/pseuds/prefertheconsultingdetective
Summary: Yeah, Charles, how is retirement treating you? The answer is quite dark.
Relationships: Erik Lehnsherr/Charles Xavier
Comments: 12
Kudos: 40





	get over your hill and see

**Author's Note:**

> I have several headcanons for after THE CHESSGAME and this is a very soft one, especially soft!Erik. Maybe I will elaborate. Probably not, as I am very bad at it.

> "But there will come a time
> 
> You'll see, with no more tears
> 
> And love will not break your heart
> 
> But dismiss your fears
> 
> Get over your hill and see
> 
> What you find there
> 
> With grace in your heart
> 
> And flowers in your hair"
> 
> After The Storm - Mumford & Sons

“Maybe we should have done this sooner,” Erik says. 

They are on their second game and moved from the sweet Parisian café to a dim-lit bar that Erik knew from years ago and was curious to see if it still existed.

Here they are, sitting in a corner, playing slowly, and more careless than when they started. Their conversation topics are casual and carefully hazard-free. Erik tells Charles about the times when he lived in Paris before they met and then again for short periods with the brotherhood. 

His french is a bit rusty, but their waitress is impressed. She thinks about how Erik looks really good for his age and weirdly familiar. Maybe he’s an actor, she concludes. 

“Lucky you that this lovely young woman doesn’t care much for politics and thinks you must be an actor for what your face is very familiar to her.” 

Erik smirks. “I’m sure you could have handled her. Or maybe we could have had a lovely chat about it.” 

He sounds relaxed and at ease. It’s such a crass contrast to the usually defensive and angry Erik that Charles knew all these years. 

They are on their third drink, and Charles feels the familiar buzz at the back of his mind that helps him dim out all the voices at least a little bit. Maybe he should stop drinking in the future, but right now, he enjoys the companionable feeling of sharing expensive drinks with Erik. They haven’t done this in years. 

“Your move,” Erik says, and his eyes are bright. Charles wonders if he might be talking about something else than chess entirely. 

Charles moves his bishop without thinking much about it. He is probably going to lose this game, but he doesn’t care anymore. 

*

“Why haven’t we done this sooner?” Erik asks later when they moved to Charles’ suite. He’s staying at an expensive, but a relatively small hotel that is outspoken mutant friendly and the mind of the employes don’t reveal anything on the contrary. 

They aren’t playing anymore, Erik’s little travel set closet on the coffee table between them. They’ve also moved from martinis to whiskey from the minibar. Charles had watched while Erik took the glasses and floated the bootle to the sofa by its metal cap.   
He still found Erik’s casualty with his powers as irresistible as always.

Charles takes a contemplative sip of the whiskey. Feels the burn on his tongue. It’s a rhetorical question and frankly, it’s quite stupid given their history. 

Erik tips back his head and laughs. 

“You don’t have to answer this.” he grins. He is getting a little flushed. They haven’t touched any of the serious topics, Erik seemingly sensing Charles’ resistance. He still hasn’t wrapped his head around it himself. The fall out with Hank, Jean, and - Raven.

Charles swallows. Suddenly his cheery mood falls like a card house. His thoughts brushing through it like wind. 

He rolls his chair backwards. 

“If you excuse me for a moment. I have to use the toilet,” he says curtly. 

His reflection in the mirror looks pale and worried. Charles feels exhausted and shallow. His carefully constructed world fell apart. Mostly by his own doing. Maybe Erik was right. Raven definitely was. 

When he comes back into the room Erik is standing by the window. Charles downs the last of his drink. It burns in the back of his throat. 

“You could have read my thoughts today”, Erik says while looking at the twinkling Eiffel tower. “Why didn’t you?” 

“Old habits are hard to break.” Charles laughs humorlessly. “Also you’ve much quieter than when we met.” 

Erik lifts his brows. “Less angry?”

“No, that’s not what I mean actually. It’s more like the volume of your thoughts has been turned down a little.” Charles still remembers when it seemed like Erik was shouting internally all the time. 

Obviously, Charles himself has also become way better at ignoring people’s thoughts, mostly just keeping tabs at whatever is happening at the surface. But Erik’s thoughts have an entirely new quality to them. They are more of a low buzz at the back of Charles mind. He is clearly aware that Erik is there, thinking freely and without the damned helmet, but while Charles could just dive in and explore, he doesn’t. 

“I’m sure you are just as angry as you used to be.

“I don’t think so, actually.” Erik disagrees. 

“Naturally, there are things that I will never get over. My family. My daughter.”

The waves of thought reaching Charles get a deafening quality. Dark and brooding. More like what he is used from Erik. 

“But there are other things that I am comfortable with. Genosha and what we are building there. Maybe that is how you used to feel about the school.” Erik takes a sip. “It’s not like one good thing cancels the bad, but it surely helps.” He shrugs.

Maybe Charles used to feel the same, right now there’s not much good left in him, it feels like. 

He thinks about Erik’s offer of a home. The grand gesture of peace. 

“Is that why you came here? To offer me a good thing to help with the bad?” He feels cold. There’s one profound difference between them. While Erik was always painted as the villain, recent events showed that Charles to be the selfish, vain bad guy all along. That is how he feels, anyway. 

It makes him feel laughed at and ridiculed.

“I don’t need your pity.” Charles sneers. 

“Really? That is what you think I am doing?” Erik raises an eyebrow. “offering you to live on Genosha out of pity? Trust me, it couldn’t be farther from it.” He puts down his glass and takes a few steps away from the windows towards Charles. 

“I offered you a home because that’s what you did for me. You never pitied me, Charles, you understood me. Don’t you think I can do that for you, too? We always had a special connection, you and I.” 

“I killed my sister, Erik. Because I was too focused on my image to hear what she was telling me. I killed Jean, too. I - “ he stops. Everything washing over him. The guilt and shame that he thought himself so above everything. 

“You made mistakes. They had consequences. It’s something you will have to live with for the rest of your life. Don’t you think I never thought I killed my family, too? It’s a fact that if I hadn’t been Magneto they would still be here with me. We’ve made countless mistakes and now we will go on and try our best not to repeat them. That’s the least we owe them.”

“But how can I go on when they aren’t here? I have lost Raven before and I didn’t deal with it well. But at least back then she was still alive.” Charles makes a chocked sound. He wants to drink more, to drown out all thins pain he is flooded with. He feels so pathetic, especially with Erik right there. 

They are silent for a while. Erik steps closer and puts a hand on Charles’ shoulder. He feels warm through the fabric of his shirt.

Charles is thankful that he doesn’t try to offer words of comfort. He doesn’t think that he could take it right now. But having him here, it’s okay. 

“I want you by my side, Charles. Just like in the beginning.” Erik says and Charles looks up to see him smile, softly. He is really glad Erik is here, after all. 


End file.
